Wednesday, January 11, 2006

Tiddly Bits

Just a few odd socks and missing undies:

Girls (by which I mean of course, boys), this may be your new dream man. TSSH first discovered him and initially and mistakenly put him on the market for the (actual) girls, perhaps overlooking this somewhat glaring clue: favourite musician: kylie (female).

So it looks like the Dreadster might now have some competition for Victoria's No 1 uber-right, neo-con homo pin-up boy?

(And if John happens to be reading this - mate, you drive me to drink sometimes, but you know the love, or at least respect, is there :P)

And girls - unlike Dread, Tim is single.

So dust off those Victorian Young Liberal application forms, slip on those Rockport boat shoes, hyphenate that surname, buy that terrace house in Prahran with that trust fund, run down that Green Left vendor in Daddy's Lexus, watch that Demons match at the MCG from the corporate box and be prepared to jump back into the closet come pre-selection time, coz Tim is there for the taking! Yes, you could be the next Jeanette (or even Tanya)!!!

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Saw The Family Stone last night. That's not really news of itself (3 stars Margaret - predictable, contrived, occasionally moving, Sarah Jessica Parker is very good at playing an uptight, neurotic bitch, wonder why?) - the news is that because I arrived late to it with my friend, we struggled to find two empty seats next to each other. We did find two empty seats with this woman sitting between them, who refused to move when we asked ever so politely.

Seriously, what the fuck is wrong is people?! Do human beings like this even exist outside of Sydney? When I pointed out that moving down one seat would not kill her I was greeted with a primeval grunt. Wasn't enough to ruin the enjoyment of the movie - or for friend and me to derive a little guilty pleasure by quite pointedly and probably more times than necessary passing our popcorn and Coke across this woman's lap.

If nothing else, the fact that she was there alone and will probably die alone and be eaten by Alsatians was karma enough for us.

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One of the three reasons to watch the Australian Open this year is gone. Still, Roger and Andy still appear to be on track for it. Anybody else reckon Andy


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looks a wee bit like Seann?

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Another example of outstanding family values and excellent heterosexual parental upbringing that clearly demonstrates why same-sex couples are unworthy of adoption.

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Neighbours is back for 2006. Initial thoughts: What's up with the new cartoonish opening titles? I know it's a G-rated show but does it have to look so much like Play School?

Dan's now in the opening titles and set for a love triangle with Izzy and Elle. I actually think his acting, somehow, is getting worse.

Liking Harold going a bit loopy-loo and now making dirty prank calls to Paul. I even thought the muffins he brought him on Monday night might be chockas with a slow-release poison.

And can we please get around to revealing the true plane bomber? Clearly it wasn't Tony Corbett as the dude was hung up over Izzy, not Paul. I've narrowed it down to either Gus or Darcy. In the meantime it's a little hard to take seriously Harold wanting to kill Paul when it's so bloody obvious he should be directing his misplaced psychosis towards Izzy, since she's the reason Gus/Darcy put the bomb on the plane in the first place.

Honestly, you'd think the Neighbours writers are taking selective liberties to contrive sensationalist plot twists. And I'm sure that's never happened before!

32 Comments:

At 11/1/06 12:24 pm, Blogger Riza said...

Don't panic Sam, Tommy Robredo is still coming to play.

 
At 11/1/06 1:05 pm, Blogger Sam said...

Ding dong! Thanks for that Riza. You have impeccable taste.

 
At 11/1/06 1:41 pm, Blogger JahTeh said...

Obviously not GoldClass where the best people sit.

Why didn't you hold hands across her instead of passing popcorn?

 
At 11/1/06 2:28 pm, Anonymous David said...

G'day Sam,

Tim Wilson is certainly better looking than Chris Pearson, but on scanning his site I conclude he is no better informed.

 
At 11/1/06 3:05 pm, Anonymous Bazza said...

Sam. You have presented us with a diffcult choice, as to who will win the accolade of "The most up themselves Naff Queen" 2006.

Over to the Tennent Creek jury:
"Bon soir Tennent Creek" may we have the results of the Tennent Creek jury? Merci!

 
At 11/1/06 3:10 pm, Blogger DREADNOUGHT said...

I'm not a bloody neo-con, but rest easy, the affection is mutual :)

Some bloke called me a bloated chipmunk the other day. Naff Queen is a bit limp-wristed by comparison.

 
At 11/1/06 3:36 pm, Blogger Shane said...

i could have outed tim wilson years ago - no secret he likes the backdoor.

one of the funniest thing i ever saw was tim wilson giving a majority audience of "national broad left" and "national org of labour students" a plenary on what it is like to be a young liberl (or something like that - I didn't actually listen to the bollocks).

hilarious!

 
At 11/1/06 4:36 pm, Blogger mikey said...

"The most up themselves Naff Queen" 2006

That's easy - it's dreadnought, who has a severe case of self-obsession, fag-face and fag-voice. I'm sure he'll win the Naff Queen award un-opposed for the next 10 years or so. The RSL club incident last year made him a contender, his laughably vain performance on TV seals his decade of victories.

I also want to know what dreadnought actually does with his supposed boyfriend if anal and oral sex are off the menu? Do they sit on their twin single beds and swap holy cards?

 
At 11/1/06 4:54 pm, Anonymous Bazza said...

Mikey. Thats not nice deadnaught and his ( he really does have a partner? weird!)

partner?
have adjoining A V Jennings, Tuscan designed en suite. Sort of like what Big Benny as in Rome...so he can call out! hey Big Boy! peel me a grape!

 
At 11/1/06 5:06 pm, Anonymous Bazza said...

Deadnaught. When one is plain one has to live with it. So please do not have any self guilt about being plain, Someone has to be. There again those catholic priests in their outrageous drag must be a turn on for you.

 
At 11/1/06 5:15 pm, Anonymous Bazza said...

Hey Deadnaught. Just remembered we where in Rome, met this blonde guy (out for you know what!) we chatted with him, and turned out he was a priest. We asked why? he said where else can you wear drag like that and get away with it.

 
At 12/1/06 9:14 am, Blogger Sam said...

Now now kids, play nice. John's as welcome to QP as (almost) everybody else, even if we do have very different perspectives on life and other catastrophes.

 
At 12/1/06 11:47 am, Anonymous Bazza said...

Sam. Respect your comment and it is your show, but when Deadnaught makes derogatory personal comments against GLBTI people( as he also does on other blogs). Its handbags at the ready!

 
At 12/1/06 2:07 pm, Blogger DREADNOUGHT said...

I'm not going to respond to obvious silliness, but I've never made any such personal comments.

No wonder the mainstream finds 'gay culture' so repulsive. If we're riddled with rotten hearts and impulsive bitchiness how can we hope to get anyone on-side?

Wake up, life is so much grander than that.

 
At 12/1/06 2:35 pm, Blogger Sam said...

The mainstream doesn't find "gay culture" so repulsive John, at least not in my experience. The many straight people I know don't really give a shit either way, so long as whatever we do doesn't frighten the horses. Those likely to feel terribly repulsed or offended by us are usually at the extreme fringe of the mainstream.

General message for all, however: John has a fair point. What he may or may not have said on other sites is irrelevant here, as he hasn't made derogatory personal comments towards me or any QP posters, at least none that I know of and none explicitly on this site.

I'd prefer to keep the punches above the belt please.

 
At 12/1/06 3:25 pm, Blogger mikey said...

This comment has been removed by a blog administrator.

 
At 12/1/06 4:10 pm, Blogger mikey said...

Way to be democratic and two-faced. You showed your true colours, Sam.

*eyeroll*

I'll say it for everyone else who missed it:

Dreadnought is completely devoid of irony if he doesn't realise he's also a homoactivist.

 
At 12/1/06 4:24 pm, Blogger Sam said...

Mikey: I had just put up a post saying I didn't want any more abusive, below-the-belt postings, and you proceeded to put exactly that right after it. That's actually really disrespectful of me and my site.

You know you said a lot more than "Dreadnought is completely devoid of irony if he doesn't realise he's also a homoactivist". If that was all you'd said I would have left it up. I've never deleted a post and I would prefer not to again.

It's not being two-faced at all, I'm trying to be as fair as I can. I don't want people carrying out their personal attacks of each other in the comments of my site. That goes for everybody.

 
At 12/1/06 4:32 pm, Anonymous Bazza said...

Thank god for private schooling!

 
At 12/1/06 4:43 pm, Anonymous Bazza said...

Hey Sam. Have you checked out "Towelroad" website, some real spunky pics of Andy Roddick. Seems he shaves his chest, well I hope so, or he's a masochist!

 
At 12/1/06 4:50 pm, Blogger Sam said...

Mmm thanks for that baz. Very nourishing indeed.

 
At 12/1/06 5:29 pm, Anonymous Bazza said...

Tabloid Comment: NineMSN, have created an image of what AJ and Brad will produce has a child and NineMSN have already given the poor child a name:

Brangelina.

Who said there are no closet queens in the tabloid press?

 
At 12/1/06 5:42 pm, Blogger mikey said...

Sam, if you actually watched Dreadnought on TV, you'd see he loves nothing more than antagonising others. By paying out on him, I'm doing him a favour. Unlike you, I actually care about his welfare and want to ensure I have years of gold content to pay him out with (I'm really hoping for a TV appearance on a channel people actually watch, but it won't happen), thereby ensuring he stays happy. Or goes completely psycho. Either way, I'll be entertained. Life would be so dull if everyone just kissed arse all the time.

Also, as an Antipodean, I was bought up to knock anyone down who places themselves on a self-made pedestal. He has the tallest self-made pedestal, too bad it's made out of guano.

 
At 12/1/06 7:13 pm, Blogger JahTeh said...

Mikey, have you thought of going into politics? You have a wonderful way with insults that should propel you up the ladder to Prime Ministership in no time.

 
At 12/1/06 7:47 pm, Anonymous bazza said...

Jahteh. hey hey! when you don't challenge those who try to deny our being, then your are a wanker. As they use to say in the 2nd world war: "Fifth Columnist!" ( sacrifice others for my being).

 
At 12/1/06 8:04 pm, Anonymous Bazza (Plain but nice!) said...

BTW. What ever the Sydney Telegraph or the Melbourne Sun, say in their gossip columns Randy( oops!) Andy Roddick and I are just good mates. I just carry the shaving cream...OK?

 
At 13/1/06 12:16 am, Blogger DREADNOUGHT said...

I appreciate irony, I value humour but Australians are fair when bullshit-bashing. If a post-Southpark showing on SBS is a pedestal then God help us all.

You should actually read some of my site, or actually meet me. Believe it or not, I'm not about to go psycho.

Unless, of course, Roddy P'totty doesn't play a day match on Jan 26th :)

 
At 13/1/06 9:25 am, Blogger cvm said...

On a slightly lighter note, the SMH today has poached your observation about Sean W-S and Andy Roddick.. check the back page.

 
At 13/1/06 9:33 am, Blogger Sam said...

Mikey: If you feel the need to "knock people off their perch" by making aggressive personal attacks against them, go nuts.

My point is: do it on your own site or even John's, not mine.

Thanks for the injection of a lighter note, Kym. I'm hoping this will be in the last in this unnecessarily long thread of postings.

 
At 13/1/06 10:51 am, Anonymous S said...

hey sam, looks like you're the latest blogger to cop a theft from those beeyotches at the Herald's Stay In Touch column.

 
At 13/1/06 2:12 pm, Blogger JahTeh said...

bazza, there was a smiley at the end of my comment which disappeared.
If you read my archives you'll find I do support gay and lesbian issues.
I just like Mikey's insults, I use them on my ex.

 
At 13/1/06 2:14 pm, Anonymous Bazza said...

Jahteh. "Your terrible!"

 

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