Monday, February 21, 2005

Murdoch Magic

Just when you thought Murdoch publications couldn't sink any lower, couldn't smell any stinkier...

First, we have this poor bastard discovering foetus crusader Pope Tony Abbott III is his old man. Not much more needs to be said here. We all know of Tony's "do as I say, not as I do" approach to family values and we can hope that, by some karmic balancing act, Daniel O'Connor will follow in the steps of Phillip Ruddock's daughter and renounce his dad's politics completely, preferably in some very public arena in front of all his mates. Certainly, the fact that O'Connor works for the Marxist Alliance - oops, ABC - and could not stop swearing upon learning his dad's true identity (when you think about it, it's a bit Star Wars, isn't it? Darth Abbott: "Daniel, I am your father." Daniel Skywalker: "No! FUCK NO!!!!!!!!!!"), as well as Abbott's cronies describing young Skywalker as a bit of a "hippy" who's more likely to vote Labor than Liberal, are very encouraging signs.

This was not what boiled my potato this morning, however. The steam began to rise when I dared myself to read The Daily Terrograph's assessment of this unsual family reunion. A few lines in, and I could not believe even the Terror could be so sycophantic about a Howard minister, with choice phrases and adverbs like:

"Mr Abbott and Mrs Donnelly...have embraced their son Daniel and his adoptive parents and have introduced him to their families...",

"Thank you for having me,'' Daniel movingly told his natural mother and father when he first met them early in the new year...",

"Both Mrs Donnelly and Mr Abbott were overwhelmed by the surprise contact with their son and hastened to make him feel welcome in their families' lives..."

By now it's sounding less like a newspaper and more like a Woman's Weekly article, right? Or maybe the work of an obese, salivatingly right-wing Howard apologist, Labor basher, Greenie hunter and...Wait a minute.

Abbott reunited with lost son
By PIERS AKERMAN

Suddenly, everything became clear. Murdoch's most parochial fascist columnist posing as a journalist. I wonder if this was under direct instruction from Liberal HQ? Probably.

Then, to completely clean out the Murdoch empire of its few remaining crumbs of vaguely respectable journalism, Aussie gives us the headline: "Push to find real work for blacks."

I shit you not.

"Push to find real work for blacks."

Mr Lefty begs: "Somebody please get a screen grab of that before they take it down." Hear, hear.

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